When I was a child, I spent countless hours at my grandparents' house. Ganga and Papaw, as we affectionately called them, lived just a short distance away, and I found it hard to leave their side during our visits. My parents often remind me that regardless of how recently I had stayed over, I would always insist on another sleepover.

Part of the charm was the endless supply of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and the excitement of exploring an upstairs, something my own home lacked. However, the true magic of their home lay in the stories. My Ganga read an abundance of books to us, and she is credited with teaching the whole family to read. We all learned to follow her finger as she read aloud, echoing every word she spoke.

Recently, while browsing through a Goodwill store, I stumbled upon a familiar book amid various items and mask-wearing patrons. I had just moved into my first apartment and was searching for something to place on my coffee table. And there it was—The Little Red Hen. As I flipped through its pages, I was reminded of the valuable lessons it imparted. This short book demonstrated the significance of helping others while also acknowledging the worth of my own contributions. Interestingly, psychology supports this notion.

The Little Red Hen: A Brief Synopsis

The narrative is quite straightforward. A little red hen discovers some wheat seeds and decides to plant them. She lives in a barnyard with her chicks, along with a pig, a cat, and a duck.

When she goes to plant the seeds, she asks the other animals for assistance. They all respond with a resounding, "Not I!"

Consequently, she takes it upon herself to plant the seeds. As time passes, she cultivates a bountiful crop. Again, she asks, "Who will help me cut the wheat?" The lazy animals, preoccupied with their activities, refuse to lend a hand, so she proceeds on her own.

This pattern repeats itself. She seeks help from the pig, cat, and duck with tasks like grinding flour, making dough, and baking bread. Each time, they decline to assist, leaving her to complete all the work.

At the story's conclusion, after pulling the freshly baked bread from the oven, she asks, "Well, who will help me eat this warm, fresh bread?" Suddenly, the cat, pig, and duck eagerly volunteer! The little red hen responds:

> “No, you won’t... You wouldn't help me plant the seeds, cut the wheat, go to the miller, make the dough, or bake the bread. Now my three chicks and I will eat this bread ourselves!”

And they enjoyed the bread!

Helping Where You Can

One clear lesson from this tale is the importance of assisting others whenever possible. You don’t need to be a superhero to contribute; even small acts of help can make a significant impact.

Psychology suggests that altruism is inherent in us. Humans often help each other without expecting anything in return. However, research indicates that helping others may actually yield benefits for ourselves. Engaging in prosocial behavior—helping others—has been linked to improved health and longevity.

A study published in Health Psychology highlights this fascinating finding:

> “A research team from the University of British Columbia gave a group of older participants with high blood pressure money to spend. On three consecutive weeks they were each given $40. Half the participants were instructed to spend the money on themselves; the rest were asked to spend it on someone else—buy a gift for a friend, donate to a charity or otherwise benefit others with the money.”

The results revealed that participants who spent money on others experienced decreased blood pressure, comparable to the benefits of regular exercise or a healthier diet.

Moreover, helping others may contribute to a longer life and provide resilience during stressful times. A study in the American Journal of Public Health tracked 846 individuals in Detroit, Michigan. Researchers surveyed them about recent stressors and their helping behaviors, then monitored their health over five years.

The findings were striking:

> “Specifically, stress did not predict mortality risk among individuals who provided help to others in the past year... but stress did predict mortality among those who did not provide help to others.” (pg. 1)

Additionally, assisting others can enhance our happiness. A study published in Motivation and Emotion involved participants playing a game. Half were told that their correct answers would lead to a charitable donation. The researchers found that:

> “As compared to the control condition, [the donation group] experienced more positive affect, meaningfulness, and marginally more vitality.” (pg. 1)

This research illustrates that prosocial behaviors benefit the helper, even when they do not meet those they are aiding. The little red hen, after all, was simply looking out for her fellow barnyard creatures.

Say it with Me: My Time Is Valuable!

The little red hen was not merely selfish; she repeatedly offered the other animals chances to assist her when she genuinely needed it. Each time, they declined.

“Not I,” they responded when she sought help.

Recognizing the value of your time and efforts is a crucial aspect of self-worth. This isn't about arrogance or narcissism; it’s about understanding that you, too, require care, support, and the recognition from others.

Several related concepts are important here: self-esteem, self-worth, and self-compassion, all of which differ in key ways.

Self-worth refers to your intrinsic value. The American Psychological Association defines it as “an individual’s evaluation of himself or herself as a valuable, capable human being deserving of respect and consideration.”

Self-worth lays the foundation for self-esteem. Psychologist Kristin D. Neff explains that self-esteem is “an evaluation of our worthiness as individuals, a judgment that we are good, valuable people” (pg. 2).

To clarify, self-worth is a binary concept—you either feel valuable or you don’t. Self-esteem, on the other hand, reflects how experiences shape your perception of your own worth. Low self-esteem can lead to feelings of being undervalued.

A particularly relevant concept for the little red hen is self-compassion. Dr. Neff states:

> “Compassion can be extended towards the self when suffering occurs through no fault of one’s own... Self-compassion entails three main components which overlap and mutually interact: Self-kindness versus self-judgment, feelings of common humanity versus isolation, and mindfulness versus over-identification...” (pg. 4)

Valuing your own time and efforts requires self-compassion. Acknowledging the energy you invest in tasks means you should appreciate those contributions as you would yourself. This becomes especially pertinent when others perceive your self-value as excessive.

In The Little Red Hen, the cat, pig, and duck likely judged the hen for not sharing the bread. However, she had invited their help numerous times and was justified in relishing the fruits of her labor.

Cultivating self-compassion allows you to accept the hard decisions involved in excluding those who fail to recognize your worth. Ultimately, you may have to advocate for your own value.

This lesson is particularly applicable to freelance artists or writers who pour countless hours into their work, often without assistance. When someone requests free work, remember: your time is precious! Consider any low offers carefully; it’s crucial to be compassionate towards yourself in these decisions.

Childhood Reading, Adult Living

I owe a great deal to my Ganga for not only teaching me to read but also for imparting valuable life lessons. The Little Red Hen—a seemingly simple story—taught me the importance of helping others when possible, as well as valuing my own worth. If I possess the time or skills, I should assist others when I can. Conversely, I must recognize my own value and not allow others to exploit my time and talents.

Social science supports these insights, indicating that our propensity to help others is ingrained in our nature and yields physiological benefits. Helping others is inherently rewarding. Self-worth is also a vital aspect of our lives, serving as a gateway to higher self-esteem and fostering self-compassion.

So, lend a hand, appreciate yourself, and relish the rewards of your hard work whenever you can!

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