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Embracing My Identity: The Journey of 'Anne, The Feminine'

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Chapter 1: The Revelation

This morning, I had a thought during my shower: perhaps I should change my profile name to ‘Anne, the Feminine.’ Is this a genuine attempt to redefine myself, or simply a whimsical idea?

What does the name 'Anne' evoke in one’s mind? It’s a timeless name that radiates warmth and grace. Its simplicity and directness offer a vibe that could be interpreted as modest or approachable.

Does 'Anne' carry a more feminine essence than 'Ann'? It seems to, doesn’t it? It feels a touch more delicate and refined. A creative, spirited woman with an aura of sophistication and depth? Dynamic, expressive, and unrestrained—yet still polished?

Would the addition of the extra “e” lend an air of beauty and intrigue to this otherwise straightforward name? It suggests a layer of thoughtfulness and depth beneath the surface.

But is this worth discussing? Does it hold any value for you as a reader?

I don’t experience a true identity crisis that demands your attention, unlike those who face significant challenges regarding their identities. There’s merit in keeping some reflections private; not every thought deserves to be shared.

Nevertheless, a name carries substantial weight. It can embody deep significance, serving as a core component of one’s identity. It connects individuals to their family histories, fostering a sense of continuity across generations. Hearing one’s name evokes a sense of self through neural pathways.

I was raised in a convent in South India, where I was educated by nuns and attended mass daily. In a country with only a 1.5% Catholic population, primarily remnants of colonial history, my name felt quite foreign. In my local culture, names were often extended with an 'aa' or 'ae' sound. So, 'Jacob' became 'Jacob-e,' 'Thomas' turned into 'Thomas-e,' and I was called 'Ann-e.'

In the local language, Malayalam, the word for elephant is 'aana.' Consequently, throughout my schooling, I endured ridicule for my distinctly English name, which was often mispronounced.

Now that I’m older, why does this still linger? Is my inner child seeking a form of rebellion, wanting to reclaim my name by renaming myself, at least as a pen name?

Personal Branding

A unique name can serve as a powerful tool for personal branding. It’s memorable and distinguishes me in both professional and social settings.

Does it? In today’s world, especially post-pandemic, there’s been a surge in exploring diverse gender identities. For me, simply identifying as a woman feels refreshing.

Of course, this perspective might provoke criticism from those with complex identities. I respectfully acknowledge that I cannot fully understand your experiences or challenges. I’m merely sharing my reality.

In Japanese culture, the idea of Wabi-sabi—embracing transience and imperfection—resonates with my views. This philosophy celebrates beauty, simplicity, and authenticity, encouraging acceptance of one’s true self and unique journey.

A Statement Against Stereotypes

This name can be a challenge to gender stereotypes, confronting societal expectations of women. It asserts that being a woman encompasses many dimensions beyond traditional roles.

I sincerely hope so!

If identifying as a woman can serve as a critique of female stereotypes and challenge societal expectations, then that’s a worthy endeavor. I’m still waiting for the proverbial light bulb to illuminate the significance of this.

Am I contributing to a broader conversation about women's visibility and representation? Is it a subtle yet impactful way to assert the diverse nature of womanhood and question entrenched biases?

Inspiration for Others

By choosing a name that highlights my gender, I might encourage other women to embrace their identities with confidence.

That thought gave me pause. Are there any fellow women who struggle with their identity? While it’s often a man’s world—as debated in various discussions following the 'Barbie' phenomenon—should we hide our femininity? Should we merely exist without making our presence felt?

Is this a continuous evolution of my identity? A bold step that not only defines who I am but also invites others to reflect on their own identities and the labels they choose to adopt or discard?

So yes, I’ll embrace being a woman, making it clear to everyone, leaving no stone unturned.

A Conversation Starter

‘Anne, the Woman’ is an intriguing name that could spark discussions on topics like women’s empowerment, gender equality, and personal growth.

But do I really want to engage in those discussions? I find myself weary of rehashed conversations on these issues. I’d prefer to delve into something that requires deeper thought, like Quantum Computing or Reinforced Learning, which sounds far more fascinating.

A Personal Journey — and Philosophical Foundations

The name symbolizes my personal journey and my acceptance of my identity as a woman.

What am I? In Hindu spirituality, the essence is captured in the phrase ‘Tatvamasi,’ meaning ‘That Thou Art.’ Hindu teachings do not differentiate between genders beyond superficial identities.

Tatvamasi suggests that the individual soul and universal reality are intertwined. This principle applies equally to men and women. When I identify as a woman and a man does the same, we are united in the universal essence.

Similar concepts exist in various philosophies: the 'Imago Dei' in Christianity, the Buddhist principle of 'Anatta' or 'Non-Self,' and the Yin-Yang in Taoism all explore the interconnected nature of seemingly opposing forces within ourselves.

In Conclusion

And so, I identify as ‘Anne, the Feminine’ for the time being.

May this pen name endure.

May I contribute to culture in my lifetime.

A Question for You:

How has marriage altered your identity? Did you retain your birth name? While a shared surname symbolizes unity, could there be a more egalitarian approach where either partner chooses the other’s name or invents a new family name altogether, rather than defaulting to the man’s surname? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

If you enjoy my writing and wish to support my work, consider buying me a coffee.

Thank you for your engagement—your claps, responses, and shares mean a lot!

In this video titled "How To Embrace Your True Self," the speaker discusses techniques for self-acceptance and embracing one's identity.

In the video "Embracing otherness, embracing myself | Thandiwe Newton," Thandiwe explores the beauty of embracing one's unique identity and the importance of self-acceptance.

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