Maximizing Your Potential: The Hidden Costs of Hobbies
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“You must make sacrifices in life, or else your life will become the sacrifice.” - Anonymous
In 2020, YouTuber Alex Becker made a drastic lifestyle change by selling his luxurious mansion, Lamborghini Aventador, and various symbols of wealth to move into a minimalist condo furnished solely with a standing desk, chair, and bed.
His reasoning was straightforward: all those possessions were a significant distraction from expanding his software business. Even with ample funds to employ staff to manage his estate, he found himself burdened by the daily responsibilities of ensuring staff punctuality and managing paperwork, which consumed hours each day. Thus, he decided to sell everything.
In his newly simplified environment, where only a bed and desk remained, he could fully concentrate on what mattered most—growing his company—because distractions were eliminated.
Watching his explanation sparked a realization for me. Although I wasn’t a millionaire with a mansion, I was inadvertently mirroring his situation. My home was cluttered with hobbies and projects—a digital piano, painting materials, furniture to restore, and sewing tasks—that created unnecessary work. Like Becker, I was devoting countless hours weekly to cleaning, organizing, and planning various side projects.
If you’re like most people, you might relate. You likely have some clutter in your space that you plan to tackle "when you find the time," along with hobby supplies for multiple interests stashed away in a closet.
Minimalism was a trending topic in the 2010s, but this conversation transcends just clearing out unused items. It revolves around the things you actively engage with and how, despite their enjoyment, they can divert your focus from what truly matters.
Just as Becker had affection for his Lamborghini, I cherished my hobbies and home improvement tasks. A significant portion of my week was dedicated to organizing, engaging in hobbies, and completing various household projects. It made me feel accomplished; I prided myself on my ability to balance work, a tidy home, and projects that many people never finish.
However, the irony lay in the fact that for every completed project that gave me a fleeting sense of achievement, there were chapters of unwritten books, unfinished work projects, and vital life goals that remained unfulfilled.
Life is finite. You, me, our neighbors, even renowned artists and global leaders—we all have a limited time on this planet. Realistically, we have around seventy years, and even less than that when you consider childhood and the later years of rest. For every aspiration, whether it’s raising children or writing a novel, you might realistically have around fifty years to pursue them.
Now, imagine continuing to live as you do today until the age of eighty. Reflecting on how you spent your life, would you be satisfied?
I know I wouldn’t. I’d regret spending too much time on trivial tasks like recycling thrift store finds. I’d ponder the writer and entrepreneur I could have been had I devoted my energy to my true passions instead.
You Don't Have Time for Everything
You might wonder, “What’s the downside of keeping extra hobby supplies or projects around? If I don’t want to engage with them, I just won’t.”
However, research in psychology suggests that having too many options can hinder decision-making and diminish satisfaction with the choices made. In a study, participants presented with a broader selection of jams were less likely to purchase any specific one and felt less content with their choice when they did.
When your home is cluttered with numerous entertainment options, you experience a similar effect. You are less likely to participate in any particular activity (and more inclined to lounge on the couch), ultimately feeling like you’ve squandered your time. This clutter makes it significantly harder to make headway on your essential life goals.
This isn’t a novel concept. In Slow Productivity, author Cal Newport highlights that one of the key aspects of sustainable productivity is to “do less.” Focus on fewer projects but commit more attention to each one. While Newport didn’t specifically address hobbies, they often mimic work in terms of dedication, organization, and time management. Consequently, they can drain your energy and distract from what genuinely matters.
Hobbies and Mental Health: A Misconception
I hesitated to inform my friends and family about my decision to scale back on hobbies, knowing they’d likely express concerns about my mental well-being. Conventional wisdom suggests that hobbies and side projects contribute to a balanced life. If you mention only working in your free time, people might urge you to consider the risk of burnout.
While it is true we need downtime to recharge mentally and emotionally, upon closer examination, many hobbies may not provide the relaxation we seek. Instead, they often center around:
- Enhancing self-image (e.g., learning an instrument to appear cultured)
- Fitting in with societal norms (e.g., hosting dinners, shopping)
- Financial prudence (e.g., home renovations, upcycling)
- Environmental consciousness (e.g., thrifting)
- Maintaining health (e.g., team sports, outdoor activities)
No hobby or side project is inherently detrimental. If you genuinely find them enjoyable and restorative, continue pursuing them. However, many people don’t find their hobbies restful; instead, they feel like obligations. Statements like “I must refinish that furniture tomorrow!” or “That piano sits untouched every day; I should practice” reflect this sentiment.
If you feel a sense of responsibility toward your hobbies akin to how you’d feel about neglecting work, that’s not a hobby—it’s a self-imposed obligation. Release yourself from that burden.
Since I reduced my hobbies, my overall satisfaction with life has improved. I now devote my energy to what truly matters, rather than trivial pursuits that only provide a fleeting sense of achievement.
Reflective Questions for Hobbies
Consider your various hobbies, side projects, and chores at home. Reflect on why these activities occupy your time. Instead of focusing on immediate benefits, such as “mending clothes saves money,” delve into the underlying values, like “saving money is essential.” Then, assess the significance of those values and their origin.
For example, I decided to abandon the hobby of mending clothes. Growing up, my parents overspent on unnecessary items, and I wanted to avoid that pattern. As an adult, I swung to the opposite extreme, buying thrifted items and mending them instead of investing in new, quality products.
However, I realized this habit was not enhancing my life. Extreme frugality demands significant time; preparing meals from scratch, mending clothes, and constant upcycling can consume hours daily. There’s a reason homemaking is a full-time role. I recognized that by eliminating these frugal hobbies and focusing on my career, I could earn enough to afford new items many times over.
I also came to understand that my self-worth had become tied to this behavior. Spending less than the average American gave me a false sense of superiority. I felt proud of being “waste-free” and “environmentally conscious.” However, the reality is that I’m just one person; even the most wasteful practices would have a negligible impact on the environment. True environmental change requires activism, not merely personal frugality. My motivation was more about ego than genuine concern for the planet.
Meanwhile, my writing desk sat idle, waiting for me to create something—anything. Each day, I found myself avoiding writing in favor of less meaningful tasks that felt easier to tackle.
Here are some questions to help you evaluate your hobbies and side projects:
- Do you fantasize about becoming exceptional at this? If so, it may hold more significance than you realize.
- Is this hobby a form of physical activity? If it promotes fitness, that’s a positive aspect.
- Does the idea of engaging with it bring you joy, or does it feel like a chore?
- Do you enjoy the process itself, or are you primarily motivated by the end result? If it’s the latter, it may not be the right fit.
- Do you feel productive through this project, or is it merely a way to feel useful without genuine progress?
- Have you actively pursued this hobby in the last year, or do the supplies merely represent an identity you wish to embody?
Conclusion
Unlike the mostly positive experience of quitting social media, letting go of hobbies and projects has been challenging. I’ve had to mourn the image I held of myself as an eco-friendly seamstress or a versatile artist.
Grieving lost possibilities is part of life. Most of us will eventually confront the reality that certain dreams, like becoming an astronaut, will remain unfulfilled. Yet, it’s far better to mourn untraveled paths than to reach the end of life with regrets about not having chosen a direction at all.
As the quote at the beginning suggests, “You must sacrifice in life, or else your life will become the sacrifice.” Let that sacrifice encompass trivial pursuits such as social media, unnecessary TV shows, and half-hearted hobbies, rather than what truly matters: your most significant ambitions and deepest dreams.
When you reach eighty and reflect on your life, it won’t matter if you wasted time on social media or trivial hobbies. What will resonate is the realization that you didn’t live your life doing what you genuinely wanted. That would be a tragedy indeed.